Summer Book Awards!

With summer fast approaching, the two of us have been thinking about what our summer reading is going to be about.

We both keep a list of books where we keep track of titles, authors and short impressions of what we've read. So, since we've been together for a whole year now (YAY!), we thought it would be fun to write a little something about what this year in reading has been like for the two of us.

After comparing lists we realized we had different opinions about a lot of them. However, we were in total agreement about others.

So, we thought it might be fun to list some of them and do a short review. Then we sorta got carried away (OK, Matt got carried away!) and came up with this idea of giving out "Awards" for the best ones. So, instead of doing what professional reviewers do (since we don't qualify for that), we decided to just look at everything we've read for the past 12 months and give a little "2 Boys In Love Book Award" to our favorites.

So, here's what we're gonna do starting next week. We decided to give a special award in a these categories:

Favorite General Fiction

Favorite Non-Fiction

Favorite M/M Erotic Fiction

When we make our awards in each category, we'd like to invite you to make your own award in that category and a short comment about why you liked it.

So, don't start handing out your awards just yet! We're gonna take the three categories one at a time, and that's when you can give out your award. Except for the last category listed above, the others don't necessarily have to have a LGBT theme. It would be nice if they did, but don't let that stop you from making your own award.

My Dad and His Girly-Boy Son

I've always wanted a good relationship with my dad. For me, however, it's always been an on-again, off-again sort of thing. It seems like we're now doing some serious work to hopefully repair things for good. At least I hope so.

It's funny. There's this one memory I have going all the way back to when I was about 6 or 7 years old. Me and some of the neighborhood kids were outside running around like kids do. I also remember a lot of chaos was going on. You know, nobody was in charge and we were just all over the place having fun. I seem to remember there was a soccer ball involved, like we were just kicking it around with no clear purpose in mind. We were all in a good mood, laughing, yelling, screaming, just being typical little kids.

I don't know how reliable every detail of my memory is, but I do remember making a lot of noise, giggling, flapping my arms all over the place, running around like a kid raised by the wolves!

I remember seeing my dad leave the house heading for the car. He was probably on his way to run an errand or something. I like to think he was watching me for a second and just enjoying seeing his only son playing and having a good time. At least that's the memory I wish was true.

What I remember as clear as anything in my childhood is him yelling at me, "Brad, stop running around like a girl!" I also remember it suddenly getting very quiet. All the other kids seemed to stop in their tracks and were looking at me, then at my dad, then back at me. My dad got in the car and left. After a few more seconds of total silence, there was some snickering and the other kids were making fun of me. You know how kids can be. There was this chant, "Brad's a little girl! Brad's a little girl!" Even the girls were joining in.

I honestly don't remember what happened after that. One thing is absolutely sure in my mind, though. Somehow I fully understood what he meant. In the space of like three seconds I go from being a girl to a boy. I stop giggling. I straighten my body. I stop having fun. I don't know what to do next. I just wanted the chanting to stop. What did my dad see that I didn't see? All I knew was that he was my dad and I trusted him.

We never talked about what happened. I was totally afraid to bring it up. I mean, I was just 6 or 7 at the time. How do you talk about something like that with your dad? Especially if you're a little afraid of him? I was always waiting for him to bring it up again -- kinda hoping he would but also terrified that he might. I mean, I was hoping he would apologize for what he said and say he was just in a bad mood or something. That he really didn't mean to hurt my feelings, especially in front of my friends. But, then I was also afraid if he brought it up he might lecture me about how bad I was for "being a girl," and how disappointed he was that his only son didn't seem to know how to act like a boy.

Since he never brought it back up, I figured he was probably right. Maybe there was something really wrong with me that I was "acting like a girl."  Maybe there was nothing more to say about it. End of discussion. Case closed.

I think that was when I first started feeling totally different from everybody else. Even though I didn't know the word for it then, I believe that was the beginning of some kind of depression. All I knew at the time was that what he said made me feel so sad and ashamed. And there was nobody to talk to about it. What I decided to do was to watch the other boys and try to act like them. Looking back on it now, I think I started dying inside. I was so confused and and didn't know how to be what my dad wanted me to be. I wanted him to love me more than anything.

I think he wanted to like and accept me, but it came at the cost of stopping all that "girly" stuff. I tried a few times to toughen up and be what I thought he wanted me to be. He seemed to like me better that way. But did I want to give up playing dolls with my girl friends? And what about the thrill I got when some of the girls showed me how to apply makeup? None of it made any sense to me.

Fast forward to my early teenage years. My dad started drinking more than usual. I know he and my mom were arguing more. It scared the hell out of me. I worried they were going to divorce and I didn't even want to think about how my world would collapse after that. I was totally convinced I was the cause. I knew at some level that he felt all of us were a total disappointment to him. But, I felt I was more responsible for everything. I mean, I kept going back to that incident when I first disappointed him by "acting like a girl."

His drinking got gradually worse. He never, ever got physically abusive. But when he was drunk, he would say horrible things. I had come out as gay to them when I was 15. Maybe that was a mistake. I mean my mom and sister totally accepted it. My dad just looked disgusted and called me his "faggot son." He never said anything like that when he was sober. He actually was a decent dad and did normal stuff with me, like talk to me about school, how I loved playing soccer, etc. He even use to come to some of my soccer games and appeared proud of me. But then when he was drunk, it was some other person inside my dad's body.

I don't want to go into all the details here for personal reasons, but the end result was that he decided to stop drinking. He started going to some A.A. meetings, which I know was hard for him to do. He had a few slips but it didn't seem like he was going back to his old ways where he became verbally abusive. He actually went back to his meetings and got what they call a "sponsor," which, from what I can tell is like some kind of guide or somebody you could call when you feel like drinking and get encouragement and support.

He's been totally sober now for almost a whole year! June 15th to be exact. During this past year, he and I have been doing a lot of talking about our relationship -- one-on-one! How cool is that? We've also been to see this family counselor, another thing I knew would be hard for my dad. Tell you the truth, it was hard for all of us, including me. And you know what? This counselor is totally cool and smart and honest and blunt and, most important of all, caring. I can feel it. I totally trust her. 

She eventually pressed the issue of how everybody dealt with my being gay. And my dad talked about his feelings about his relationship with me -- his feelings, for God's sake! Not his bullshit feelings, but his honest-to-God feelings of being sorry for causing so much pain to me. I have to be honest and say it was hard to believe him at first. Was he just saying this to get the counselor off his back? Well, as they say, the proof is in the pudding. I've gotten to the point where I trust what he says when he tells me he is truly sorry for the verbal abuse and not being there for me.

Last week he took me to see this soccer game a friend was playing in. Afterwards he took me out for ice cream. Just me and him. Without any prompting from me, he brought up the gay thing. He told me he was totally cool with it. I just grinned and said, "Even the girly-boy part of it?" He smiled, lowered his head, then raised it and looked me directly in my eyes. All he said was, "I'm cool with the girly-boy part, Brad." Then, wonder of wonders, he just added, "You're my son. And you know what that means? I love you. All of you. Period. End of discussion."

We both got teary and then he asked how me and Matt were doing. Well, that got on a happy subject. He actually asked all kinds of questions about Matt. As we were walking back to the car to go back home, he put his arm around my shoulder and just said, "Matt deserves somebody like you."

So, I'm learning a lot about love and forgiveness. And guess what? My dad's proud of me! I think this is going to work. I have to believe that. I mean, that's what "hope" is about, right? Hope and love.

Speedo Boys & What They're Thinking

Okay, everybody. Now for a brief (no pun intended) break to have a little fun.

So, what do you think the two cuties are thinking? We'll call them "Reacher" (as in reaching for the merchandise) and "Watching" (with the ball in hand)?

Meeting Matt's Family

In his post yesterday, Matt recalled some of the wonderful memories he had about the beginning months of our relationship. One memory I have occurred about two months into our dating and is very special to me, not only because it involved meeting Matt's whole family, but because I began to seriously be convinced that I was in love with him. I knew my feelings were strong already but for some reason it sorta clinched the deal for me. Matt and I didn't use the "L" word at that time, but I know I was thinking about it.

Matt has this incredible relationship with his mom, his dad and his two brothers. Matt had been telling them about me from the time we first met and his mom told him to invite me over for dinner so they could all meet me. A date was set for a Saturday night and I found out later that both his brothers made a decision to bail on plans they already had so they could be there! Imagine that! Matt told me that was a huge deal for his brothers because they were hugely independent and rarely changed their plans for anybody.

As the time got closer, I was starting to get more nervous. For some insecure reason I started thinking about how I could win them over. Matt had never had a boyfriend before and I was thinking all eyes were going to be on me, so I better make a good impression. Matt reassured me that I didn't have to prove anything to them. "Just be yourself. They're gonna love you." Yeah, sure. Easy for him to say!

When Matt and his mom opened the door, I had some cut flowers for his mom. His mom didn't wait for Matt to introduce me. She just had this huge smile on her face and said, "Well, you must be Brad. Oh, and look at the flowers! That's so sweet. They'll look perfect on the table. Come on in and meet everybody." Matt was taking all this in and grinning from ear to ear. He kissed me, ushered me in and closed the door.

His mom realized she hadn't introduced herself and apologized. For some reason I was expecting something more formal, but she leaned in and gave me a sweet kiss on the cheek! For some reason I knew everything was going to be alright. I could see where Matty got his charm!

His dad came in the room, introduced himself and said how happy he was to meet me. Then his two brothers came in (one is 2 years younger and the other is 2 years older than Matt) and I met them. His younger brother immediately said he heard I liked soccer and started asking me questions about my school team, what position I played, etc. His older brother smiled and kinda slowed things down. He just said, "Whoa, everybody. Let's just go in the den and get some snacks and something to drink." Big brother to the rescue!

After about 30 minutes I felt like I had been a part of the family forever and was returning home after a long absence. It's funny but I don't know who I hit it off with better. After some snacks, him mom let me come in the kitchen to help her with some last minute dinner things. I had already mentioned that I loved to cook, so she said it was nice to have a man in the house who wasn't afraid of the kitchen. Matt, his dad and brothers let out a huge howl. "Awwwww, that's not fair!" It was great fun. Matt just winked at me.

During dinner, Matt just sat back, grinning most of the time, while everybody asked me questions and began telling me stories about Matt. It was clear that I had stepped into this incredibly close family. I mean, it seemed like they were so comfortable and easy with each other. Pretty soon I no longer felt like a guest. It was like they were treating me like a family member.

After dinner, his younger brother took me to his bedroom where he showed me some trophies he won for soccer. We talked a little while and realized we liked some of the same music and movies.

His older brother got out some baby pictures of Matt and sorta took me through his childhood. It was so clear and obvious his older brother loved Matt. We both laughed and I think bonded over enjoying some pictures of Matt making these ridiculous funny faces when he was a kid. He was already a ham and a show-off when the camera was around! Some things never change as you get older, do they Matty? :)

His dad was a great joker! He was so kind and had this subtle -- and sometimes not so subtle -- sense of humor. For example, as I was getting ready to go, he said something like, "Well, Brad. Any boyfriend of Matt's is a friend of mine! You're always welcome here, but, well, how can I say this? Hmmmm, I am going to have to ask you to empty your pockets before you leave. Just for security sake. I know you'll understand." He was saying all this with a completely serious face. I think my eyes darted between him and Matt and then his dad just said, "Well, maybe I can make an exception this one time, but I better not hear of any familiar jewelry being pawned in the next month or so!" Then he let out this huge laugh and gave me a bear hug!

When I left, every single one of them said I was to consider myself welcome in the home anytime. His dad said he hoped I didn't think Matt came from a crazy family. I felt so comfortable by this point that I just looked at everybody and said (with the same straight face his dad had given me earlier) that I knew of a good psychiatrist I could refer them to. Well, you would have thought I had said the funniest thing ever uttered by another human being. Did dad didn't miss a beat and said, "Well, Brad, since you seem to have found something redeeming about Matt, you are going to join the family in any therapy!" I swear to God I didn't want to leave.

Matt followed me out to my car. Before I even got to the car door I realized I was crying. I turned to Matt to give him a hug and kiss and realized he was crying too. He looked right into my eyes and all he said was, "You are so amazing. I actually think they like you more than they like me." Well, we just hugged and held onto each other for a while.

He called me later that night and told me everything they all said about me. After just two months of dating, I went to sleep that night with the "L" word on my mind. Was it possible that I was in love with him? All I remember before falling asleep was that I had a huge smile on my face.

Happy Anniversary to Us!

Who would have known that a little over a year ago, I would have fallen in love? Something I always wanted to happen, but it was more like an abstract idea than something I could see and feel and hold and, well.... you get the idea.

So, to mark this amazing milestone, I jotted down some things I've been thinking about.

"I love you." Somebody said that three word sentence has been used so many times that nobody really knows anymore what it means. Or, I guess it can mean just about anything you want it to mean.

Brad and I met a little over a year ago, and we've been talking a lot about our relationship. We've been trying to pinpoint when out first-year anniversary is. We've decided that we have a number of "firsts" that would qualify as an anniversary of some sort.

I met Brad for the very first time at my birthday party when I turned eighteen, a little over a year ago. So, what do you call that? I'm tempted to call it our "Love at First Sight Anniversary." Is that too mushy? What does that really mean, Love at First Sight? I remember seeing him for the first time and having this "stunned" feeling. I swear to God it was like I went into this trance or something. I know that sounds a little dramatic, but I can still remember my whole body tingling all over when I looked and saw the most beautiful guy I had ever seen come in the door. I almost forgot where I was and who I was with. I mean, there were at least 25 other people at the party and I just zoned out and he and I were the only ones there.

I asked him out on a date for the following weekend. I took him to dinner and then a movie where we held hands for the first time. So, maybe that was our "First Date Anniversary."

Even though I wanted to kiss him at my birthday party and then again after our first date, it took a lot of restraint on my part to slow things down. I've always had a hard time pacing myself and slowing things down when I have this impulse to do the first thing that comes to my mind. It might be because I have that ADHD thing going on and I have to take a deep breath and think things through. But I also realized I didn't want to mess anything up with this beautiful guy. He had this low-key shy thing about him and he always looked so calm and sweet and sometimes I thought there was something delicate about  him.

I remember thinking, Whatever happens between us will be worth the wait. And for the time being, holding his hand was even better than what I thought kissing him or even having sex with him might be like. You have to take my word for it, but we were able to say a lot to each other through holding hands. Sometimes it was a gentle hold, sometimes it involved this sweet squeezing, sometimes there was a warm sigh passing through our hands and then there was this firm and extended grip that said, I don't want to let you go.

It was pretty obvious to both of us that we had this special chemistry going on. I remember having to restrain myself from calling him 3 or 4 times a day (OK, that's an underestimate). Why couldn't I stop thinking about him?

After we had gone on maybe four dates, I wanted to ask him if he thought we were a "couple" now. I had never felt this way before and to be honest, I had no idea how to bring it up. Where was that Guide to Dating handbook?? What if he really liked me (which he seemed to) but was thinking about dating other guys? I mean, he never gave any indication he was thinking that way, but I guess I was way too insecure then. I had heard from friends of mine that gay guys have a hard time committing to each other, especially the younger you are (all this so-called "wisdom" when I never asked for it!).

Was I moving too fast? Was I going to scare him away by being so intense too early? I really feared he might drop something on me like the whole, Let's be friends and, well, maybe see other people and then talk about it. Again, all this was coming from me and my insecurities. He seemed as totally into me as I was into him.

The more time we spent together, the stronger my feelings became. Brad seemed  so comfortable with himself and  his body that it was a little unnerving to me. When he would talk to me -- just normal everyday conversation -- he would sometimes reach over and touch my arm. He would never linger there longer than a second or two. It's like sometimes people would add a slight touch to the words they were using. He never overdid it but it would always make me a little self-conscious. It's like that little one or two second touch was saying so much, if not more, than his words. It was probably the first time anything like that had ever happened to me -- or it was the first time I had noticed.

The night we both said, "I love you," was so very special. We'll write more about how that happened later. For now, all that matters is that we can say we've have a number of different "anniversaries" and they're all very special.

So, for now, HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, Brad! All of them!

I love you!

Coming Out & Coming In: 2 Lessons from Maine

Matt and I were talking about our vacation to Maine. It's hard to believe we've actually been together a whole year now. So much has happened. I've met the boy of my dreams. Fallen in love. Lost my virginity. Gone to my school Prom with my boyfriend. Graduated High School. Just returned from a one-week vacation as a graduation present from Matt's aunt and uncle. Unbelievable. Friggin' unbelievable! Except it's all true!

It's was obvious to everyone at the Bed and Breakfast that we were a couple. I mean, duh! The owners of course knew because they're friends of Matt's aunt and uncle. Each of the other three couples probably figured it out in like 30 seconds. No way they would figure we were brothers (how many brothers our age hold hands, call each other things like "babe" or "sweetie," or kiss?) or even think we were best friends.

I've been out as gay since I was 15. I'm 18 now. It still amazes me how in some ways it is easy to come out to people, and how it terrifies me in other situations. Going to the B & B made me nervous. I mean, we were going to be spending a week with three other (unknown) couples and there are never any guarantees about what people are going to think (which I don't worry about all that much) but you never, ever know how they are going to treat you. That I worry about. I mean, this vacation was a graduation present for me and it was the first vacation Matt and I have ever taken. I wanted it to be perfect for both of us.

It ended up being about as perfect a vacation as I could have hoped for. One couple was a little stand-offish at first, and they didn't interact a whole lot with us like the other two couples did. They didn't say or do anything that was rude or offensive, so we have that to be thankful for. They were sorta noticing us, but not really including us in things, which is their right. I mean, no big deal.

The other two couples, and the owners, were totally accepting and inclusive of us. One of the women nudged her hubby one evening while everybody was in the Common Room in front of the fireplace after dinner. Me and Matt were sorta cuddling and enjoying the conversation and all the questions they had about how we met, going to the prom together, our families, etc. The wife said to her hubby something like, "Now, watch those two sweet boys, Harold, and learn something about romance." Harold turned three shades of red but he, and everybody, just got into the moment. We were all having a blast. How totally cool was that?

They all called us "Sleepy Heads" when we came down a little late for breakfast each morning, and seemed to enjoy making really cute and playful comments about how we were enjoying our bedroom! Man, it was almost unreal. Totally, totally wonderful!

I got to thinking about how "Coming Out" also included the opportunity to "Come In" as a whole person, if that makes any sense. I mean, coming out is something that comes from inside you and is directed to others. By "coming in" I mean that you "come into" a more complete person when you can just be your whole self with others.

I noticed that I learned more about myself when Matt and I were in a safe place to just be ourselves. I mean, we didn't have to censor anything we said or did in front of them. I felt like something really amazing and important was happening "in" me as a result of being "out" and completely myself there. I felt, I don't know, more mature, more whole as a person, more confident, more hopeful. I kept telling Matt that I was beginning to understand what "joy" is all about. I also began to feel "fully alive." I know this may sound like a lot of clichés, but, believe me, inside it was almost overwhelming. I guess that's what I mean when I say that "coming out" is an opportunity to "come in"..... to come into you're true self.... to be a part of life without hiding, so be seen for who you really are.

Writing about all this is making me so happy. I feel a lot more hopeful about the future -- our future. I feel like I'm "coming into" more of who I am as a whole person! What more could I ask for?

Sex Anyone?

Well, we've safely arrived back home from our vacation in Maine! There were a few things about the vacation we want to write about, so we hope to have that up shortly.

We also want to get back to something we wrote about a while back. You know, in so many ways our relationship and love is growing, but it's not all been "smooth sailing," which I suppose is typical of any relationship. I mean, you grow through all the good times you share AND also the "hard stuff" can also make you stronger if you know how to work through it.

We've had some minor arguments and a few major ones over the past year. Thankfully we've been able to clear things up and work some stuff out. We think it's made us stronger in many ways. Some of it has been easy to work out and other things have been very hard and scary. I mean, there's a lot at stake, right?

So, we're talking about how we're going to write about it. One of our readers sent us a message about whether we ever argue (short answer: yes!), and if so, how is "making up." We guess it's pretty normal after spending a lot of time talking about an argument, expressing our feelings, including anger, disappointment, feeling hurt, etc., that once you get things worked out and clear the air, you have all these pent-up feelings going on afterwards that need a release. And, yes, we're talking here about some pretty intense lovemaking.

We've talked about how much detail to include in the "making up" part. We don't want to turn things into a major porn site {sly grin}, so we're not sure how everybody feels about hearing about that stuff. Like, how much is Too Much Information? We never wanted our blog to be so serious that we never had any fun, and, well, maybe writing about the "making up" might fit in the "having fun" category.

So, we were wondering how all of you feel about hearing about that? How much is Too Much Information? We're going to ultimately decide that for ourselves, of course, but we thought we'd ask for your feedback. So, give it some thought and maybe use the comment section for this post to leave us your thoughts. If we make it too racy, would you be inclined to think less of us? Would you prefer we keep things kinda like they've been going, or would it be fun to hear more of the "down and dirty" details? Let us know.

Boy Wears Skirt to School. Times are 'a Changing!

I hope this link works. It's about this young boy who decided to wear a skirt to school, and the reaction of his peers and school administrators.

Young Boy Wears Skirt to School

Leaving Maine

Just a quick note that we're leaving the B & B in Maine and headed back to my aunt and uncle's home for an overnight, then back to Boston!

We had a fantabulous time! Hope to post more toward the end of the week.

Here's a few pics for your viewing pleasure:

Our bedroom

Matty in charge (as usual) in the stern!





Rounding the corner!





Smooth kayaking



End of the road!

Postcard from Maine

Okay, just so we're clear here... This is Brad starting off this postcard from Maine. Matt had promised we wouldn't be checking our Blog and definitely not posting anything until we got back. He wanted us to just concentrate on our little vacation and take a break from the "real world." But, well, Matt being Matt, he's getting a little antsy about people deserting us while we're away for this week. He begged me, "Let's just log on for 3 minutes and see if our 'Followers' have dwindled from almost 100 to less than 5." My response? "Matty, will you just relax and come back to where we are? Do you really believe people will just go elsewhere looking for two cute young guys to read about? (LOL)" Well, he gave me one of his "love punches" and said, "Just 3 minutes. That's all. Then I can relax again." When I said, "Okay" (I mean he's so irrestible when he begs with that little-boy look), he looked around for the laptop and couldn't find it. He looked over at me and I had this huge grin on my face. He just said, "Okay, cutie, now where'd you hide it?" After another "love punch" I gave in and told him where I had hid it. All I said was, "I'm timing you. Three minutes! If you go over that then I get to decide the punishment." He thought a second and grinned and said, "Okay."

So, without further ado, heeeeeeeer's Matt:

Okay, very funny, Brad!! Okay, so I'm checking and see we still have "Followers." I gotta make this quick, I've only got 2 minutes and 15 seconds left!

WE ARE HAVING A BLAST! The weather is not the best. Cloudy, occasional rain, temperature in the 40s (F), but this Bed and Breakfast where my aunt and uncle sent us is fabulous! There are four bedrooms and we have a view of the ocean from our window. Each evening the owners have two pieces of chocolate on our pillows! How cool is that! 

We've been kayaking, bicycling, shopping (Brad got some really cute outfits, including some of those tight jeans that show off his ass really well {panting}, and I've been buying my family all kinds of gifts like locally-made pottery, etc.). The Bed and Breakfast has this HUGE fireplace in the Common Room and since the temp is in the 40s, they've had a very romantic fire going at night.

And guess what? The people here are so, so nice. The other three couples are middle-age (I'm not gonna say a number 'cause I might get in trouble with some of you!) and straight and NONE, I repeat NONE of them have any problem with us being a gay couple!!!! I feel like we're in heaven. I mean, they think we are totally adorable with all our "young love," holding hands, cuddling, "sweetie" this, "sweetie" that! But I think it's Brad they think who's totally adorable!" (I had to say that 'cause he just told me I'm over my three minutes!) We were sitting in front of the fireplace last night and the wife of one of the couples actually said to her hubby, "Watch them, Harold, and learn a thing or two about romance." She said it in that really lovely way, like she was acknowledging our love and actually enjoying it! Totally, totally cool!

Well, I'm gonna run now. Before I go, everybody raise their right hand and swear to whatever you hold sacred that you will not desert us! I promise we have a lot of interesting stuff to share with you. You may even be surprised with some of it.

Well, Brad's been making this game-show "Buzzzzzzzzzz" for the past minute so I'm gonna sign off. Between you and me, I deliberately ran over the three minutes just to see what kind of surprise or rather "punishment" he has in store for me! Hmmmmmmmmmm. See ya all when we get back! Love you all!

Matty's a Daddy! Postcard on the Road to Maine

I know Matt said we would be taking a short break from the blog as we trekked to Maine. I just had to share this short and cute story with all of you.

So, on the interstate to Maine, we decided to stop for lunch at one of those fastfood joints you see at a rest area -- kind of a mini-mall where you can get gas, eat, walk your pet, pee, buy souviners, etc.

We got our lunch and found a booth and there's this family sitting directly across from us. Looked like a mom, a dad and their son who was maybe all of 5 or 6 years old. When we sat down, the little boy (who looked like he was a bundle of energy) looked over and stuck his tongue out at us! We both just smiled back at him and started eating.

Well, the boy wasn't finished with us! He made this really funny face, you know, kinda sticking his tongue out, making bug-eyes and puckering his lips at us. Then he took a bite of food, started chewing it and then opened his mouth so we could see inside!! Well, we both just cracked up laughing and his parents looked horrified!!

The parents scolded him (nothing dramatic...I think they just wanted him to chill and didn't want everybody in the restaurant looking their way), but did Matt cooperate with their efforts to calm him down? Okay, let's all say it in unison: "NO!"

Matt just smiled and made a really funny face back at him. I thought I was going to have to tell Matt to chill or the parents would have two kids to control! Well, the little boy just cracked up and an instant friendship was made!

So, both of them started making funning faces to see who could outdo the other. The parents watched the whole thing and I think they were relieved that their son was not making loud noises because Matt was putting his index finger to his lips in that universal gesture of saying, "Shhhhhhhhh," and the boy was minding him!

The parents looked so relieved and actually struck up a conversation with us. They were traveling from Connecticut and we told them we were from Massachusetts on our way to visit family in Maine. The mom asked if we were brothers and Matt said, "No. We're boyfriends. My aunt and uncle invited us as a graduation present for Brad." They didn't even bat an eye, but smiled and said that was really thoughtful of them.

We talked a little more and then got up to leave. Well, the little boy got upset we were leaving and started crying. So, after empyting our food tray, Matt went over to the souviner counter and bought a pair of children's sunglasses and took it over to him. You should have seen the boy's face light up. Matt told him they were special sunglasses that helped little boys mind their parents. The boy just looked at Matt and had that look that said, Are you serious? Then he broke out in this huge smile and his parents had to remind him to say thank you. As we were leaving, the boy and Matt were waving goodbye to each other.

When we got back to the car, I just looked at Matt and said, "You know, you are really sweet. I didn't know you were that good with kids." He just smiled back and said, "Well, guess I'm just a big kid myself."

When we were back on the road, I told him I was going to start calling him "Matty the Daddy." He just grinned and said, "Well, you never know. Maybe we'll have kids some day." WHOA! I didn't know what to say. We had never talked about this kind of stuff before. But, Matt, being Matt, just went on talking about his aunt and uncle and jabbering about whatever. As usual, Matt was being a "Chatty Cathy" and I was enjoying hearing everything he was talking about. We were about an hour away from his aunt and uncle's home, so it was relaxing to be talking about different things.

But, I couldn't stop thinking about his comment about having kids. He was so good with that little boy, like he knew exactly how to relate. Well, needless to say this topic deserves more thought..... but for now, I just want to relax and enjoy our little vacation. And "Matty the Daddy" just asked me to put in another CD of some relaxing music. This is going to turn out to be a really cool vacation. I can already feel it!

A Short Break

Brad and I will be taking a short break from the blog. My aunt and uncle have invited Brad and I to visit them in Portland, Maine for a few days. I have always been close to both of them and they are like second parents to me.

I've been talking almost non-stop (typical for me I guess!) about Brad and they've never met him. So, as a graduation gift to him they've invited us for a visit and then they're sending us to this little island resort just north of Portland for 3 days!

A graduation gift to Brad! And they've never met him! All they know about him is what I and my mom and told them. This is so sweet and special to me I started crying when they invited us. I just have to say here that I love my family! My aunt said it's a graduation gift to Brad and a "We Love You" gift to me! Can you believe that?

So, we're leaving tomorrow morning and will be back next week. Please don't abandon us! We're taking our laptop but will probably not post anything until next week.

Bon voyage to us!

English Teacher Harassed For Being Erotica Author

This English teacher, who has a 25 year career, was recently "outed" when some parents discovered she was a published author of erotica. From what I've been able to find out, it seems her students knew this and didn't care.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Matt! May 8

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY, MATTY!

Matty, It was at your 18th Birthday Party one year ago that we met for the first time! What a year this has been!

Was it love at first sight? Is there really such a thing? I'd like to think there is!

Remember what I wrote in this blog about that afternoon when you asked me if I would go out with you? All I said was that simple "Okay," but what I was thinking inside was: "Dude, I want to leap into your arms right now and go trotting off to one of those mountain resorts to sit in those heart-shaped bathtubs with you!" So, whether we ever get to one of those mountain resorts or not, all I can say is the location doesn't matter as long as we're together.

I know you are my first love and somehow I have this confidence that you will be my only love. It doesn't get any better than this!

So, Happy Birthday, my love! Your parents will always have a special place in my heart. They gave birth to you and since it's Mother's Day, I'm sending her a dozen yellow roses today. And since your Dad also had something to do with making you, he'll get something special on Father's Day. You, my dear, get two dozen red roses (and me, later!!)

Love always,

Brad

OK, the Lyrics are Dumb, But the Boys are Hot!

Well, we needed a little break today, so hope you enjoy the video. This is a group based out of Worchester, Massachusetts which is about an hours drive from where we live in the Boston area. The lyrics are a little dumb but you can mute that and just watch the hot guys!!


Oh, on Sunday, I have a SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT about Matty. I'll be posting it is the early afternoon. Hope you stop by! (Brad)

"Wanna Have Sex? Brad Doesn't Have to Know."

Well, I guess it was bound to happen. Still it took me completely off guard. Maybe I should have expected it, but, still.........

I have this friend I'll call "David." We've known each other since middle school and though we're not like best buddies or anything, we still see each other occasionally. He's always been a cool guy and we've gone to parties together. He's straight and I've met a bunch of his friends and he's met mine. He's totally cool with the gay thing, as are his friends.

Well, I got a call from him Tuesday night and he asked me if I wanted to come over to his place to just hang out after work. He said a couple of his buddies were going to be there and they were just going to order a pizza and chill together. Brad had planned to go with his sister to the mall for a while, and since I hate malls with a passion you wouldn't believe, I told him David had invited me over for pizza with some of his buddies. Brad has met David a few times and thinks he's cool, so we settled on our separate plans. I told Brad I'd call him later that night.

So, I get off from work, go over to David's apartment and there's three other guys already there. I knew two of them, so David introduced me to the third guy. I'll call him "John." Okay, just so we're clear here and everything's out in the open, John was, well, totally hot. Okay, I said it. Judge me if you want, but there it is.

So, we were all catching up with each other, work, girlfriends, my boyfriend, usual guy stuff. So then this guy, John, comes over to where I was sitting and started up a conversation. He seemed like a decent guy, very personable. He was asking about my work and said he knew one of the contractors my boss sometimes uses.

The pizza was delivered and we were all just cutting up and having a good time, had some cool music on, just a low-key thing. I was telling them about going to Brad's Prom over the weekend and they were giving me a hard time about being all lovey-dovey out on the dance floor. All in good taste and humor. I was having a good time and was glad I stopped by.

A little later on, David and John went out on the back deck to smoke a cigarette. My friend David told me to come on out with them for some fresh air. Since I don't smoke, I joked that there's no way the air would be "fresh" with all their smoking. I didn't say it in a judgmental way, it was just part of our dumb kidding around. I went on out anyway just to be sociable.

After they finished smoking, David went back inside and John said he wanted to ask me something. So, me and him stayed outside for a few more minutes. He said he thought it was really cool that me and Brad went to his prom together. He said when he graduated from high school two guys going together would never have happened. He said his girlfriend had to drag him to their Prom, but it ended up being okay once they got there. I thought he was being really cool about it, especially since he had never met me before.

He then said something about how his girlfriend was not "putting out" (I think that was his phrase) as much as he needed it. (Okay, so I'm thinking here, Huh? This is weird that he's telling me about his sex life - or lack thereof - with his girlfriend, especially since we just met about an hour ago. Whatever. I couldn't think of anything to say.)

He then just looked straight at me and asked, "So, you and Brad must 'get it on' a lot, huh?" I think my mouth dropped open and I cocked my head a little trying to take all this in. What came out was something like, "Man, you know what? No offense, but that's really none of your business." He looked away and sorta chuckled. After a beat or two, he said, "Oh, shit, man, I didn't mean anything by it. Sorry about that." So, I said I was going back inside. I just wanted to get away from this creep and he just said, "Hey, Matt. Anytime you ever wanna fool around, you know, sex-wise, I swing both ways. Brad would never have to know. Just think about it." 

I think I was sorta stunned at first and then felt this rage come over me. I looked right at him and said, "Maybe it's not clear to you, so let me make it clear. First of all I barely know you and this whole conversation is creeping me out. Second, whether you swing both ways or not is none of my business. But I'll tell you one thing, there's only one person I 'put out for,' as you say, and that's Brad. So, I'm going inside and as far as I'm concerned this is the end of the conversation." He started to say something, but I just walked away and went back inside.

I stayed maybe about 15 more minutes, but I was getting angrier by the minute. I wanted to get out of there before I said or did something I would regret later. I think I was more bothered by some assumption he was making that if you're gay then you probably had sex all the time with anybody willing to pull their pants down......! I was less bothered by him trying to make a pass at me, because I just figured he was this total jerk and I knew I would never see him again. I mean, he meant nothing to me. If David, or any close friend of mine, had done the same thing, it would have been a different story. But this guy was an asshole as far as I was concerned. That assumption I thought he was making totally pissed me off. It had been very clear from the first that Brad and I were a couple, and even though I never used the word "love," anybody with a brain would have figured that out.

So I left. Walking to my car, I called Brad on my cell to see if he and his sister had gotten home yet. He said they were on their way and would be home in about 10 minutes. He said I sounded upset and asked if anything was wrong. I just said, "I'm okay. I want to see you." So I headed over to his house. After hugging and holding on to him, we went to his room and I told him everything that happened. After I finished, he just looked at me, grinned, and said, "I love you so much." I think I said something dorky like, "I am so glad I know you." Well, he had an even bigger grin now and said, "Uh, you mean like 'know' in the biblical sense?" It took a second to translate this, and then I said, "Yeah! Let's have a little biblical 'knowing.' Lock the door."

Well, I can say now is that maybe going to the mall is not going to be such a boring thing in the future. Who would've known?

Male Student in High Heels at School

Brad and I came across the following article and it sparked a lively discussion.
You're welcome to leave a comment as usual or there's a poll to your right if you'd rather not leave anything written. Or, you can do both.

What do people think about this article? Do you think the boy should have done this? Do you think he was just wanting a fight or attention? Do you support his actions as a way to challenge the "rule" that boys wear certain clothing? Do you think he should have taken a different approach? Do you think he was using poor judgment, or do you think "pushing the limits" is sometimes the only way to make an important statement? Should the school have taken a different approach? That sentence about, "(the) teacher said the boy's shoes were disrupting the classroom," therefore he was the problem,  sounds similar to saying a woman was raped because she was wearing a low-cut dress. 

Just looking for respectful opinions here, not a full-fledge fight. No "right or wrong" answers, please. Just respectful and thoughtful opinions. (Matt)

SOURCE: Advocate.com (April 26, 2011):

A male student at a Florida high school was removed from class when the response to his wearing high heels sparked "safety" concerns from the principal.

"Fox Tampa Bay" reports on the incident involving an unidentified student at Riverview High School. A friend said the young man, who wears the heels to feel more confident, felt “shame” for being called out of class.

According to Fox Tampa Bay, "A teacher called the principal's office. That teacher said the boy's shoes were disrupting the classroom. Principal Bob Heilmann says there was name-calling. He asked the student to take off the heels."

Heilmann did not discipline the student, but he said it was important to "take the paternal side and make sure he's going to be OK," noting that consequences occur when people go outside "the norm." In his view, it was not the shoes but the reaction to them that necessitated their removal.

The news report did not indicate whether the students who called the young man names were disciplined.

Fox Tampa Bay reports that some students protested the decision, with one boy wearing a dress to school. Principal Heilmann asked the student to change for the sake of his "safety," and the boy agreed.

A Night to Remember: The Prom, part 2

Brad & Matt, or Matt & Brad

  So, continuing from yesterday's post, my friend Amanda and I made our way to the front of the banquet hall. I just decided to entrust myself to Amanda's and Matt's assurance that they had my best interest at heart.
I'm going to let Matt write most of the rest of this, because I tried remembering what happened but since I was so nervous, I'm sure I'll get some of it wrong. The other big reason I want Matt to write this is because, quite honestly, it feels embarrassing to put down things like this about myself. So here's Matt, and I'll return for the closing:

I was so proud to see Brad walking up front, knowing how hard it had been for him to decide whether to go to his Senior Prom, especially with another boy as his date. I've learned he knows how to work through his doubts and fears and end up with a decision where he can hold his head high, knowing he's done the right thing.

When he and Amanda got up front, the whole banquet hall got quiet. I don't think anybody knew what to expect, like they had from the other four people preceding him.

Amanda went over some of Brad's accomplishments over the past four years. She particularly noted his playing a role in helping get the Gay-Straight Alliance club started. She mentioned how important it had been to him that gay, bi and straight students have a place where they can talk to each other, especially in a safe environment.

She remembered that Brad and a few others had organized a lot of the social activities for the club and even had some off-campus parties where gay and straight students could socialize and dance and have the kind of "normal" fun everybody else just takes for granted as part of high school life.

"But," Amanda said and then paused. Amanda is good at these dramatic and "pregnant pauses." There was about a 5 second delay while she got this totally serious look on her face like she was going to announce some earth-shattering news. At this point Brad had been sorta looking down, but he looked up and turned his head and looked straight at Amanda. I was wondering if he was trying to telepathically shove a thought to her brain like, "Okay, what the hell are you doing now?!"

"But........................(5 second delay)......, we began to wonder if Brad was going to find 'true love' like so many others were finding. I mean, look at this boy, will you? How adorable, how cute, how handsome, how..... well, you get the picture." (everyone began Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwing! and Brad was totally blushing and shifting from foot to foot. I wanted to run up and wrap my arms around him!)

Amanda continued with something like, "I mean, as everybody here knows (she said in a dramatically humorous way), a major goal of high school life is finding the love of your life, right?" (more yeahhhhhhhhhhhhs!)

"So," Amanda said, "Brad, like all other guys on campus, looked around to see who was available. As many of you know, Brad has more 'girl' friends than any other guy here. You straight guys eat your hearts out! (here the guys made that primitive guttural sound you sometimes hear at football games) We even made it our mission to find him not only a good-looking guy, but also a guy who was not a dork, who could carry on an extended intelligent conversation, and whose vocabulary was more that just, "Yo, dude," "What's up, man?", "Hey bro, what's goin' down?", and, "Duh." Well, we were working against the odds because that eliminated 90% of all guys here! (hoots and hollers from the guys...... Brad smiled and looked out to the guys and just shrugged his shoulders like he was saying, "I know nothing about all this, okay?")

"Well," Amanda continued, "we conducted a secret poll among the girls on campus and asked them how many who had boyfriends would dump them if Brad was suddenly available. All I gotta say, you guys, is, 'be afraid; be very afraid!'" (Here all the girls stood up and began this extended yelling and applauding. We found out later Amanda had arranged this with them. The guys were probably thinking, "Huh???")

  "But, luckily, Brad found his love. He had to go off campus to discover him, and he's with us here tonight. I'm gonna ask Matt to come up now and for the two of them to get our dancing started. So, give 'em about a minute on the dance floor, and then let's get this party in motion!"

So, I came up, reached for Brad's hand and led him to the dance floor. We didn't know what song they had selected, but it was perfect. I'm posting a version here for you, our readers. After about a minute, other couples came out and surrounded us. I think we both thought we had died and gone to heaven! ...........

So, here's Brad again:

After some dancing, we went back to our table to rest. You wouldn't believe all the people who came over to pat me on my back and to meet Matt..... girls and guys! It was totally amazing. Needless to say, Matt was a big hit. Girl after girl came over to ask him to dance with them. And, I got the about as many girls asking me to dance. I was also happy that two other gay students asked me and Matt to dance with them. Unbelievable!

The principle came over and introduced himself to Matt along with some of the faculty. They all said how happy they were to meet Matt. And, believe me, Matty was beaming. I was so proud he was here.

So, was this a Night to Remember? I think the answer to that should be obvious.

A Night to Remember: The Prom, part 1

Brad and Matt: A Night to Remember

 When we all heard the theme of our Senior Prom for the first time, everybody just rolled their eyes and had this, "Are you kidding?" look on their face. I mean, "A Night to Remember"?? Can we say boring, blasé, tiresome, humdrum, dull? Well, you get the picture. We all wondered if the Prom Planning Committee was not so subtly trying to get revenge on whoever appointed them to their task. Maybe the members of the Committee were told they wouldn't graduate unless they agreed to serve, and making the Prom as boring and uninteresting was their revenge. It sounded like the title to one of those B-rated, sentimental teen romantic movies from the 1950s starring Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello!

Well, it turned out to be a very clever play on one of the most cliché titles ever. As the Prom festivities began, the Committee got up and made fun of the title, but then said they were going to turn this cliché expression on it's head. They said they hoped the evening would indeed be a night to remember, but the surprise was it would be a night to remember some things this year has been about. In particular they were going to be spotlighting a few students who will be remembered for some famous or  infamous moments.

Well, guess who one of those Seniors was? I almost had a major panic attack and then I almost peed my pants when Amanda, one of my best friends and a Committee member, came over to our table and said they wanted to highlight something about me! I broke out in a cold sweat and Matt said I had this look of terror on my face. Matt grabbed my hand and Amanda privately gave me a little summary of what she wanted to say. She said it would be totally okay if I didn't want to be highlighted. So, I just said, "Well, tell me."

 She said I could totally trust her that it would not in any form or fashion be humiliating to me. She said if I agreed, it would involve giving her permission to be open about my being gay. Then she gave a very, very brief hint of what else she would say. I looked at Matt and he said he knew what was planned and said he thought I would love it. So, for about 20 seconds, I had these thoughts in my head: I totally trust Matt. I totally trust Amanda. I've come this far in overcoming my fear about being so public at my Senior Prom by bringing my boyfriend. If I've come this far, might as well take it all the way. So, I just said, "Okay. Let's do it."

Well, they had selected 5 individuals to highlight. One was about Academic Achievement. One was Sports Achievement. One was about achievement in "the arts." Then came someone representing "Class Spirit." And the last was just called, "Achievement in True Love." That last one was me! Well, now it was starting to sound a little cheesy and maybe they were going to cast me as Frankie Avalon, or, more appropriately as Annette Funicello! Amanda and Matt assured me they would NOT make fun of me at my expense. Instead, it was going to be something about making fun of the straight guys (in a completely harmless and playful way). Amanda said she had cleared it with the school principal and the two GSA faculty sponsors. She said they all thought it was in good taste, humorous and in the spirit of the Prom theme. The whole program was actually kinda sweet. The format was similar to a "roast," so even though the comments might be a little embarrassing, they were balanced with a lot of humor.

So, Amanda said I would be last (Gee, thanks. I had all the time I needed to sweat, panic and pee my pants!), and if I wanted to not go through with it after hearing the the 4 other roasts, it would be totally cool.

I'll just give a brief summary of the first roast to prepare you for mine. They called one of the football jocks first. I didn't really know him personally (I'm hardly qualified to fit in that pack!), but he always seemed like a decent guy. He had never harassed me for being gay or anything. So, this guy had almost lost our Homecoming Game when he caught a pass and got turned around and disoriented on the field and ran the ball to the opponent's goal post. The whole team and everybody in the stands was yelling at him until he realized his mistake and did this really cool ballet twirl thing (I think the technical term for it is a pirouette) in which he tried to stop and turn around in the right direction, but somehow he was unable to stop twirling on his toes! Even the opposing team was hypnotized watching him. Nobody moved. Then he got control of his body, stopped, and looked like a deer caught in headlights. Then all 6'4" and 230 pounds of him ran the right way. The opposing team came out of their hypnotic stare, but too late to tackle him. He made the touchdown and we won the game.

Well, the Committee said he almost got the "Arts" award for best ballet dancing! They then presented him with this little pink, ruffly tutu and tiny ballerina shoes. We were all hooting and hollering for him to try it on. He turned five shades of red and was a good sport about it. On the spur of the moment, he grabbed the microphone and announced he had been invited to join the New York Ballet Company! Then he put the tutu over his head and went back to his seat.

They went through the other three people, and then it was my turn. Amanda checked with me one more time to see it I was still okay with it. I looked at Matt and he was smiling. That smile told me all I needed to know. He had been in on the whole thing ahead of time and I absolutely knew I could trust that smile. I just said, "Yeah. Let's do it."

I know I can be an attention slut sometimes. But being the center of attention when you have absolutely no control over it, and you have to trust someone that nothing bad will happen is a whole different thing. I sorta knew the "general idea" of what was going to happen when I went to the front of the banquet hall, but I had no idea of how all my other classmates would react. That was totally out of my control. As Amanda and I were walking to the front, my head became a high-speed computer. Had I made the right decision? Was there still time to back out? Wait, what's that image on the computer screen in my head? Oh, yeah, that's Matt smiling. Somehow I knew he would not let me down. If love meant anything, it meant trust in it's purest form. Trusting yourself to someone else's love is scary. But I knew what I had with Matt was real. Well....... here goes! (Part 2, tomorrow)

Yawn! You Can Untie Me Now, Matty!

I had to wait until Matty got out of the shower to untie me before I could write this. I have to say the smell of leather is totally HOT!

So, I'll write more about the Prom tomorrow. I'm still incredibly tired from the long day and night! Plus check-out time for this hotel room is about here and somehow I gotta get my ass in gear (it's still incredibly sore and I know I'm gonna be walking funny, but, hey, it was worth it, all right?) and take a shower and get dressed.

So, the short version is the Prom itself was really MORE than I expected it to be. There was this incredible surprize that happened that I can't wait to tell all of you about. And Matt was in on it and knew it was going to happen all along! Totally fabulous and fun and memorable and I'd do it again in a heartbeat! Details to follow tomorrow.

I'll also let you in on how the hotel desserts were from the one and only incredibly HOT "Chef Matty!" He served this incredible dish of his incredibly hot body, complimented by several hot side dishes of wrist and leg restraints and a few other "sides," all with the sexy smell of leather! Who would have known the smell of leather could be so sexy? Who would have guessed that being dominated in this way could make you have all these naughty thoughts, feelings and sensations that would lead to the HOTTEST sex we've had yet! There's a lot about the toys that I still don't get (yet), but, man, I gotta say, HOT, HOT, HOT! Plus, Matt gave me this "graduation initiation" I can't wait to tell you about. It involved getting a haircut (and not on my head!!) while in restraints and spread-eagle. And a series of spankings..... well, I don't want to give it away just yet.

Whew! God, I'm gettin hard all over again and Matty says we have to get a move on so we can check out of this fancy room.......... He just threatened me with another spanking if I don't get my ass moving. Hehe..... little does he know that is not going to get me motivated to move anything!! ...... OK, OK, Matty ..... uh, I mean, Sir Matty! (I think this master-thing is going to his head. But he is so f-ing sexy when he's in charge like that!)

He's giving me time to write this last sentence cause we have to check-out. So, bye for now. More tomorrow!